There is such a trade off in being in a relationship im truely amazed that it is perceived as such an desirable state of being in our present time - although it would would probably depend on the space you hold within this time too. Consentual reality teaches you that if you not in one there is something wrong with you - youre abnormal - im not that consentual generally but it truely is difficult to be so consistant for the sake of not creating negative interpretation. For me relationships slows down time, it becomes increasingly more difficult to be optimal as your behavior and speach is filtered through this relation aspect - i do like the challenging aspect of wanting to be a better person though this comparative process but its definately very time consuming.
Yesterday i came to the conclusion that my most desireable state would be complete madness with complete control over it but today this just seems like the opposite to the relationship im in.
at least there is time and it runs out - im definately in favor of little love cycles - depth i find easily enough outside of them
i will probably think differently tomorrow again
life one day at a time as one day relationships make sence
